Who.

The fuck.

Stole our fucking cleats.

And why the fuck would you only steal the left ones?

And what the fuck is with the fucking party across the hall?

Why am I surrounded by fucking morons?!

Swear to fucking--

[private//unhackable]

This fucking cast needs to come off. I need to be able to play again.

Tch. Just when I could have used the fucking fatass and the fucking old man.

[/private]

((OOC: Not in the mirror city; the city torments him by bringing in his receiver but dumping him in the mirror city. And then sending his manager over there too.))

[filtered to Mamori, Sena, Nero // unhackable]

Don't think he's coming back.

[/filter]

[private // unhackable]

Probably better that he's gone.

Fuck.

[/private]

If you don't want to tell the fucking truth, step away from your communicators, the Network, other fucking people. Not like it's a fucking hard thing to accomplish.

[ooc: Is he affected~? Mmm~, we wonder~. But Hiruma is definitely not in a good mood. In fact, anyone in his apartment, or even the apartments nearby, probably heard a loud crash, which was him giving the coffee table a solid kick into a nearby wall.]

Rules for on-deck football!

- This is not touch football! The ball is in play until the player in possession of the ball is tackled!
- You get one try to make a touchdown--if you fail the ball changes hands and play resumes. (Note for Devil Bats: Don't fucking fail.)
- There's no kicking because there's no fucking goal posts. Play starts with a snap and ends with a touchdown or a tackle.
- Touchdowns are worth a single point.
- There's only one endzone--play starts at one end of the field marked on the deck and ends at the marked endzone or with a tackle.
- Team with the most points at the end wins (note for Devil Bats: You'd better fucking win!)

The fucking manager and I are the referees! Ready, fucking lazy asses?!

[ooc; Yes. He drew a field on the deck of the Titanic. Anyone is welcome to take part in the "game" or just be an innocent bystander than wandered onto the field.]

SO. Hiruma has learned a new trick: he can now hack into peoples accounts on the Network.

Don't worry! He really is pretty self-serving; he only does it if he has a reason.

But I'm sure we can come up with a reason, can't we?

SO IF YOU ARE A-OK WITH HIRUMA HACKING INTO YOUR CHARACTER'S NETWORK ACCOUNT, just comment here with a note. We can plot. You can give me ideas if you want, or you can wait for Hiruma's little mind to come up with one.

THIS IS OPT-IN. Obviously. And don't comment here with your usernames and passwords, just to maintain security. All that can be worked out over e-mail or IM.

Though do please leave the following:
Character Name:
Character LJ:
Series/Wiki Unless you know I know the series

<b>Character Name:</b> <b>Character LJ:</b> <b>Series/Wiki:</b>

[filtered to the football team; unhackable]

No practice today.

If you're hurt and fucking clueless, see the fucking manager.

[/filter]

[filtered to the fucking shrimp; unhackable]

The ice in the tub is for you, fucking shrimp. Use it and stop whining.

[/filter]

[filtered to the fucking fatass; unhackable]

If you don't come out and eat dinner I'm coming in there and kicking your ass out of bed.

[/filter]

Fucking manager, where'd you put the tape from the game?

[OOC: They lost the game yesterday; Hiruma's arm was broken, again, but has resumed it's old injury once more thanks to the end of the curse. Assuming that anyone who actually went to the game is probably pretty sore, hence the canceled practice. See? He does have a heart.]

LISTEN UP, FUCKING LAZY ASSES!!

Morning practice is canceled. Be on the field and ready for the game by two this afternoon. Full gear, and anyone who is late or forgets their shit is going to be eating bullets.

YA-HA!

[OOC: His wish was to be able to play a real game against another team--a GOOD team--, so the City provided. Entry can be an action log, if anyone wants to perhaps go into the game itself~. The game itself is going to be taxing but it wouldn't be any fun if it wasn't, now would it?

Also, due to Mamori's wish, Hiruma's arm is healed for the day, and thus he will be able to play in the game.

Also also, Hiruma is back from his canon update, after being gone from the City for a little over a week. Consider this his "I'm back bitches" announcement.]

WHAT THE FUCKING HELL IS THIS SHIT?!

To the sick fuck that did this: fork over the fucking key before I kill you.

I need a locksmith. Right the fuck now.

[filtered to the football team] THIS DOES NOT MEAN PRACTICE IS FUCKING CANCELLED, YOU LAZY ASSES! I only need one free hand to shoot you. [/filter]

Fuck this fucking City.

[OOC: Hiruma and Nero are handcuffed together. Since this is being posted while I am on hiatus (oooo magic~), I won't actually be able to reply to anyone until I get back (yay, backdating?), which is on the 29th of this month. Once I'm back I will happily tackle you all.]

Don't fucking talk to me. Hope the fucking City is getting a good laugh over this.

[OOC: So affected. Talk to at your own risk though.]

Don't talk to fucking strangers. It's raining special fucking snowflakes today, and the stupidity content is higher than normal.

Just when you thought the City couldn't get any more ass backwards.

FEMALES! Want to help out the American Football Club? Oh but I can't, you say, because there's already a fucking manager, and a fucking trainer, and I'm too stupid to think of how I could be of use to the football club! Stop your whining! If you want to help out the football team there's one thing you can fucking do! Be a fucking cheerleader! Boost the team's morale during games! Rile up the crowd! Think up fucking cheers! Be gawked at by every male between the ages of 12-80 in the City! Stop making excuses! Join the fucking squad!

[filtered to anyone on the football team] I better hear some fucking thanks for this.

The first idiot that gets distracted during practice because he's gawking like a pervert will get a hot piece of lead delivered courtesy of one of my rifles. [/filter]

It was suggested in HMD (thank you, precto!) that I put up a post in order to facilitate, well, Hiruma's character. I'm hoping you kind people at Poly will be willing to help me out here!

In case you're unfamiliar with Hiruma's canon (Eyeshield 21), I'll go ahead and give you the basics. Hiruma has a little black book, and in that little black book is blackmail material on seemingly everyone. He uses this book, and his information, in order to get people to do his bidding--anything from his team to games to borrowing a tank for school field day.

What's this mean for you? Well, I have some material on a couple of people, mostly from IMing and asking or stalking threads and actions posts (loev curses). However, there is no way I can keep track of all of Poly, and all the characters, and similarly, there's no way I can know all your canons and the embarrassing things that Hiruma might be able to learn and use against your characters.

So I'm putting up this post! If you want, are willing, game, and so on, to have Hiruma get some dirty information on you, ping me here! We can discuss what you want him to know, and how he can come across this information!

Thanks, again, to Caleb for suggesting this, and to everyone for being so helpful~!

(Comments are screened, because we wouldn't want this getting out, now would we?)

Has the whole fucking City gotten high? The Network looks like someone spilled cereal all over the goddamned floor. I expect it out of fucking Bossun, but some of you people are clearly hitting the bottle too damned hard.

( [Private to Kurita; very unhackable] ) [/Private]

The City likes to establish itself as fucking insane and make damned sure that you never fucking forget it.

To the fucking morons that blew up the building: you're doing it wrong. Next time make sure you have enough to do the job or don't even fucking try. Thought that you might have tried it again this morning, but it turns out someone was just moving in and making room for a fucking bear. Better not have knocked out any weight-bearing walls, ke ke ke.

Seems like the Catholic church has another fucking pervert working for it. Least this one isn't touching little boys, eh? Fucking pervert priest! What do you suppose the Pope would have to say about this? I've got some photographs he might find fucking interesting.

Seems like we have some new fucking neighbors moving in next door. The walls better be fucking thick--if I have to hear him screaming Musashi's name in the middle of the night like some fucking pervert I'm going to put him out of his misery.

( [Private; Very Unhackable] )[/Private]

Fucking lady with the bear! How'd you like your first practice? Did fucking greenie and the fucking newbie complain? If they didn't, you're not working them hard enough.

Fucking city flooded. Dammit.

( [Private to the fucking greenie - very unhackable] )

( [Private - very unhackable] )

I don't know how the fucking fatty eats all this fucking sugar.

[OOC: Hiruma has taken your candy hearts. That's right, yours. Comment here if you want to accuse him of theft--not that he's going to be bothered much by it. Or comment here if you know one of your secrets got out, and you want to try and threaten him to silence. He's eaten a HELL of a lot of candied hearts, you're looking at a 85% chance that he got one of your secrets.

Also, he has a stomachache. The boy is not fond of sugar and pretty rarely eats it. Especially not in high doses. Laughing at him will get you a bullet, preheated because he's considerate like that.]